Disclaimer: This is one of the longest post I've written on TC30s. I hope it is an inspirational confession and you like reading it.
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When I was in my teens, I prayed and cried for the Almighty to let the guy I was in love with return my love. I prayed for God to use his own time to bring that guy into my life, even if it took the eternity. I was head over hills for him for over five years and all he could tell me was that he really wanted my friendship and nothing more.
For the following five years, I wished for the same thing: to be loved by him. There were times when I felt sad, lost and unloved, because I couldn't have him in my life as my boyfriend. When I was in the deepest of my sadness I would say that I wanted Leonardo DiCaprio to become my boyfriend. Yeah, Leonardo was the guy to comfort me :)!
In the summer 1999 I decided to forget about him and enjoy my life, but he was always at the back of my mind. Occasionally I would phone him and talked to him about life. I would then transcript our conversation and analyse the words.
I never questioned God the reason I was not with him, because I completely trusted God’s judgement, but that didn’t prevent me from wishing him to become my love - even for just a night (yep, I am confessing)!
The God answered my prayers. In 2000 MY DREAM GUY asked me out! What was I going to do to keep him forever?
We went out to eat a pizza together. After the meal he asked me to join him and his friends to go watch Gladiator. At one point I was cold so I told him that in the summer 1999 I fell ill with meningitis – I don’t who why I said that, because in those days I was healthy as a red fish. I think my confession scared him off. After the evening he drove me home in his car. It was just me and him listening Kenny G.
When he parked his brand new car in front of my house, he relaxed on the car seat and said “If you like, you can come out with me and my friends again.” We just exchanged cheek kisses, like real Italians do. We didn't exchange lips kisses, like real lovers do.
I was happy anyway, so I didn't think about the last with me and my friends. Although we didn’t kiss, once back in bed that night I wrote in my diary LORD, I LEAVE EVERYTHING IN YOUR HANDS! IF THIS IS MEANT TO BE, LET IT BE. I LOVE YOU LORD, AMEN!
This guy didn’t phone me again. I phoned him few days later and he showed me the shoulders. I am stubborn, I was still in love and kept praying. We were friends. He travelled away from our city. Every time he returned I was there for him as a friend. I was looking forward to his last words "Maybe when I get back we could become more than friends." I trusted that God was working in my favour for that day to come.
In April 2001, my love interest came back in town and I heard him. I phoned him and he said “I will phone you later to see if we can go out tonight.” My heart was full of butterflies.
Then I waited by my mobile phone the whole afternoon, but he never phoned. It was the same evening that one of my girl friends phoned me to ask me out for a drink because she was in town from college. I accepted and decided to forget about that silly boy. I waited and waited, but he didn't phone.
Later my best girl friend phoned me and ask out for a drink. I accepted. It was that night that I met my wonderful husband.{more to come on my personal blog tomorrow}
I wasn’t looking for love but the Lord was working in my favour. I always put my trust in Him, because I am his daughter and he protects me against all evil. When I met my now husband I trusted in God's doing. I prayed and asked the Lord IF THIS IS MEANT TO BE, O LORD, LET IT BE!
Although I don’t go to church every Sunday, I am very religious! I believe there is a Higher Being which looks after everyone. The Almighty loves us and protects us. His time is the best and everything happens in our life for a purpose, I believe in God and trust in his judgement. I know that He is there for me and everyone who put their trust in Him always.
Sometimes we feel like the world has turned against us. Wherever we look we see darkness. We believe that we are alone in our tribulations. What we forget in those moments is that we must trust in Him, because our Father works in mysterious way, but only in our best interest.
He is our Father who said that we should not doubt him, because he is the Alpha and Omega. Our Lord will never fail us. The Lord will protect you from all danger; he will keep you safe, he will never forsake you if you put your trust in Him!
Now that I am older I put my trust in Him even more and I know that whatever happens in my life it happens because the Lord wants it in that way.
I hope today's Be Inspired Monday can help us put our trust in Him always.
Questions of the day.
1. Do you agree that the Lords works in mysterious ways?
2. Have you ever experienced the mysterious way of the Lord?
